An Indian Tale...

[JerryW Gilliland]

An Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand pulling a male buffalo with the other.



He says to the waiter: "Want coffee."



The waiter says, "Sure, Chief. Coming right up."



He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee. The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp, turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere

and then just walks out.



The next morning the Indian returns.



He has his shotgun in one hand, pulling another male buffalo with the other.

He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter "Want coffee."



The waiter says "Whoa, Tonto!

We're still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?"



The Indian smiles and proudly says ..



"Training for position in United States Congress: Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave mess for others to clean up, disappear for rest of day.

 

[Kevin Palmer]

Nice....

 

[FlipTrac_511]

Wish I could share this one with co-workers, but I'm afraid it involves a bit too much wit for most of them. At least I got to enjoy it.

 

[Rick Kent]

I was expecting a "Hello, this is Bob" story when calling tech support....



This was still good, I too will be unable to share with my co workers, work is to PC to enjoy humor anymore.

 

[TomT]

Wish I could share this one with co-workers, but I'm afraid it involves a bit too much wit for most of them.

So you work with Democrats?

 

[Kevin Lang]

So you work with Democrats?

:lol: :lol: :lol:



and a +1 for good measure.



Some of my coworkers ferverently believe that Congress is hard at work at our best interests :wacko:



Oh, and "Socialism is a good thing; if you're older than 5 you can understand this."

(Just incase scarcasm doesn't go through, I do NOT believe in that quote, for it is wrong)

 

[Bill V]

This was still good, I too will be unable to share with my co workers, work is to PC to enjoy humor anymore.

You can still share it--just take out the completely unnecessary racial components. The joke is just as funny without them...

A man walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand, and pulling a male buffalo with the other.



He says to the waiter: "I'd like a coffee."



The waiter says, "Sure, pal. Coming right up."



He gets the man a tall mug of coffee. The man drinks the coffee down in one gulp, then turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere. He then just walks out.



The next morning the man returns. He has his shotgun in one hand, pulling another male buffalo with the other. He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter "I'd like a coffee."



The waiter says "Whoa, buddy! We're still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?"



The man smiles and proudly says, "I'm training for a position in the United States Congress: Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave a mess for others to clean up, and disappear for the rest of the day."

 

[Rick Kent]

You missed the point.





Why a man and not a woman? Are you insensitive and need diversity training?



Why kill the buffalo? Animal rights activists will not like this part of the joke.



And guns, how can you possibly mention the word gun in the workplace without making someone upset.



Coffee? Caffeine is no good for you, do you expect me to pay for your health care because you will not take care of yourself?



The waiter called him Pal and then Buddy? Who is he/she to be so familiar with someone who they don't even know? Don't they teach manners anymore?

 

[Bill V]

You missed the point.

No, I got the point loud and clear. Your point is that you feel that having the Indian in the joke is not inappropriate, and doesn't need to be removed for the joke to be shared, just like all the other things you listed. But that's simply not the case.



Having the person in the joke be an Indian does nothing to affect or increase the humor of the joke. The fact that he's an Indian has nothing to do with the punchline. It was only added so the joke author could have the Indian speak broken English, to make the author's point that he/she feels Indians are either not intelligent enough or not educated enough to speak proper English.



Conversely, the gun and the buffalo are necessary to complete the punchline of "shoot the bull". The coffee is part of the punchline as well. The person is a man simply because there needs to be a person in the joke, the joke reads better if the person has a gender, and male was chosen randomly without introducing any unrelated gender stereotypes. And the waiter uses the casual terms "Pal" and "Buddy" simply to improve the flow of the joke, again without introducing any unnecessary gender/racial terms.



Don't get me wrong--I love a good ethnic or gender joke as much as the next person. But there are definitely situations where they are inappropriate--and as others have said here, forwarding around the workplace is one such inappropriate location. And even in locations/situation where they aren't inappropriate, (such as the "Gran Torino" barbershop) it's important for the ethnic/gender aspect to be an important contributing factor to the humor of the joke. When it's simply added for no humor-enhancement reason, as is the case here, everyone's better off just excluding that aspect--and the joke is usually better too.





You want to make this joke even better, and up-to-date with current events? Try this...

Two days ago, a man walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand, and pulling a male buffalo with the other.



He says to the waiter: "I'd like a coffee."



The waiter says, "Sure, pal. Coming right up."



He gets the man a tall mug of coffee. The man drinks the coffee down in one gulp, then turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere. He then just walks out.



Yesterday morning, the man returns. He has his shotgun in one hand, pulling another male buffalo with the other. He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter "I'd like a coffee."



The waiter says "Whoa, buddy! We're still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?"



The man smiles and proudly says, "I'm Al Franken. I just won a seat in the U.S. Senate. I take office tomorrow, so the past couple days I've been training to learn what people do in Congress: Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave a mess for others to clean up, and disappear for the rest of the day. Thanks for your help, and I look forward to serving you for six more years."

 

[Thomas Rogers]

Bill V,



I wasn't offended with the original, but then again, I'm not Indian...neither the dot nor the arrow variety.



Yes, I know that last comment will sound racist but I find the term "Native American" offensive...they were Indians for centuries...why not still keep calling them that? PC crap IMHO.



Lastly, your version that starts the joke with "Two days ago" doesn't FLOW as well as the original "A ____ walks into..." and then includes the "The next day...".



There are tons of "a guy walks into" jokes...but not that many "two days ago a guy walked into" jokes. I'm just saying familarity is a good thing.



TJR

 

[Bill V]

TJR, I wasn't offended with the first version either--but I still agree with the people who pointed out that it was inappropriate to be forwarding around a workplace. That's why I provided the modified version (the version which doesn't mention Franken), which I suspect would be fine in most such situations. But I got called out for not changing any other "PC" things, so I felt the need to respond to point out the difference between those claims and the Indian reference.



And yes, I'll grant that the "two days ago..." bit doesn't flow well--but with Franken taking office today, if the joke were to be pretending he was in training for two days before taking office, then the "two days ago..." is dictated by chronology.

 

[Rick Kent]

Bill V,



Thanks for explaining what my point was to me. You should market your mind reading skills.

 

[Bill V]

Man, that's really mature, fkent. Making a comment like that, after you're "You missed the point" comment did just as much presuming to know what I was thinking as I did to you. Sheez...



Grow up.

 

[Kevin Lang]

Wow...I thought the only offense would be in mocking current Congress. I didn't even consider the whole Indian bit. I still can't wrap my head around all this PC nonsense...though I must admit that I am surprised that TJR would discredit PCness.

 

[Thomas Rogers]

KL,



Don't be surprised. I LOATHE political correctness.



But I do know when what I am saying is not PC, or is on the racist side.



Like I said above, I don't use the term "Native American", nor do I use "African American". Both those monikers are, IMHO, incorrect. I still call these folks "Indians", and "Blacks". Does that make me old fashioned? Maybe. Racist? To some, maybe. I don't mean any malice by it.



My brother is also in IT (as am I). He has a contract working for one of the Indian Nations and their casino IT department. He was in a meeting talking about how they might all need to come in late and solve a potential problem. He, in an off-the-cuff way said: "If we have to we will just come in and have a quick pow-wow."



He didn't mean anything by it. There was an awkward silence for a second, then a few nervous laughs, then he realized what he said...apologized, and then EVERYONE in the meeting started laughing.



PC madness I say!



TJR

 

[Gavin Allan]

A person walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand, and pulling an animal with the other.



He says to the waiter: "I'd like a coffee."



The waiter says, "Sure. Coming right up."



The waiter gets the customer a tall mug of coffee. The customer drinks the coffee down in one gulp, then turns and blasts the animal with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere. The customer then just walks out.



The next morning the customer returns with a shotgun in one hand, pulling another animal with the other. The customer walks up to the counter and says to the waiter "I'd like a coffee."



The waiter says "Whoa! We're still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?"



The customer smiles and proudly says, "I'm training for a position in the United States Congress: Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave a mess for others to clean up, and disappear for the rest of the day."

 

[Robert Thomas]

Good Grief Charlie Brown - Lifes to short.

 

[JerryW Gilliland]

I enjoyed reading all the different takes on the joke I shared, but I like mine the best (of course LOL)



I live in Oklahoma. This joke was told to me by a full blood Delaware Indian who obviously didn't mince any words.



I agree with the PCness of the world we live in. I don't worry too much about it and seldom step on anyone's toes, that I know of. I work with the public every day and have for 45 years. You would be amazed at some of the things I'm told and I tell with no adverse effects.



The world is not as crazy as we think, IMO.